{"version":"1.0","provider_url":"https:\/\/warpwire.duke.edu","provider_name":"Warpwire","is_public":true,"duration":0,"has_caption":true,"links":{"caption":[{"label":"English","url":"https:\/\/warpwire.duke.edu\/api\/caption\/rzgIAA\/317973\/vtt\/?nonce=c5adb378e2d9e6309de4ddbaf354cc34&expiration=1787277600&signature=18a2aef39f1e925d9ce1c503a98ea582a299c7383509dc64f0523b8ec131a14d"}]},"views":0,"upload_date":"2024-03-04T14:41:24+00:00","description":"Listen in as Kai, Rudi, \u00c4ngela and Nicole are joined by Meg Wilson, the Duke Career Center Associate Director for Communications & Outreach as we discuss an answer, or many, to the question \u201chow do we merge our purpose and future with our identities, goals and everything else that makes us who we are?\"\r\nTranscript:\r\n- Hello, and welcome to the \"What's Career Got To Do With It\" podcast, where we hope to provide a space for honest conversation and information that encourages the listener to take the next steps in their career journey. So, wherever you're at in this process, we hope this episode will meet you with affirmation, guidance, and maybe some laughs along the way.\r\n\r\n- On today's episode, we are joined by Meg Wilson, the Duke Career Center's Associate Director for Communication and Outreach. As we discuss an answer, or many, to the question, \"How do we merge our purpose and future with our identities, goals, and everything else that makes us who we are?\" Meg, how do we do it?\r\n\r\n- Oh wee, that's a big question, isn't it? Good morning.\r\n\r\n- Hey, Meg.\r\n\r\n- Good morning, it's exciting to be here. A little nervous, not used to talking about myself and my thoughts. I love communicating what you all wanna tell people.\r\n\r\n- Well just think, we don't have microphones, we don't have headphones.\r\n\r\n- We're just hanging.\r\n\r\n- It's 3:00 snack time in the office.\r\n\r\n- Beautiful.\r\n\r\n- Yes.\r\n\r\n- Beautiful.\r\n\r\n- No, I'm happy to be here with you all and thinking about this is an amazing question.\r\n\r\n- And I gotta tell a story, I think, before we even get into this. When I first started at Duke, so about two years ago now, or actually over two years ago, right Angela?\r\n\r\n- A little over, yeah.\r\n\r\n- A little over two years ago. Stacey, at the time, was walking me around the office and telling me about our coworkers, and she just looks at me and she goes, \"I just love Meg. I just love Meg, the presence that she has. I wish I had that patience, that demeanor.\" And ever since then, I witness it every day. I know we all do, of this way about living and going about work and life that I think we all respect. And so to kinda shout out Meg for a second, and say, thank you, Meg, for carrying that around the office. We love you for that. We appreciate you for that.\r\n\r\n- Thanks so much, that's sweet of you to say. Stacey too.\r\n\r\n- Yeah, yeah. But yeah, I think for real, when we started this particular conversation, we were thinking about this common refrain when people ask how somebody's doing, and this is for what I've come to learn, is predominantly a response that comes locally to the United States of a response that is a, oh, I always have to say, I'm doing well. I always have to say that something good is happening. I always have to say that like, \"Oh, it's good, it's going well, I'm living the dream.\" And that's where this comes from. And you know, I think some days we embody it, some days we don't, and I would love your take on that.\r\n\r\n- Living the dream, that's a thing, isn't it? And I suspect for everyone, the dream changes every now and then. I know it has for me. What comes to mind for me is Beyonce, of course. In \"Pretty Hurts.\"\r\n\r\n- Yeah, okay, okay.\r\n\r\n- What is your aspiration in life? To be happy. And at different times in my life, happiness comes in different ways. I would say primarily, relationships with people, connections with other people on Earth that have the same worries and things that I have. And that's probably the most important. This, very important to me, also in my aspiration, is to have work where I can contribute and be a part of something big happening, and offer something to that. And I take away a lot of joy from that as well. So the happy is not always smiling, but having the strength to get through and having a moment to think about what I want. Having the resources to make some choices. That's about it for me.\r\n\r\n- What about everybody else?\r\n\r\n- I like when you said, just like, having the opportunity to make some choices, I like that. I think living the dream is like, again, making a choice to live the dream, regardless of if it seems like what the dream should be. So I like that.\r\n\r\n- Yes.\r\n\r\n- And what do you think, Rudy?\r\n\r\n- He gave Kai a microphone, he just puts people on the spot.\r\n\r\n- Yeah.\r\n\r\n- And then he passes it away.\r\n\r\n- Well, the only reason why I did that is because you hadn't been here for the episodes that we talked about living the dream. Everybody needs to hear.\r\n\r\n- Yeah.\r\n\r\n- See, you're welcome. I love living the dream, I use it all the time, and I use it in so many ways, just depending on how I am when I wake up. And that's okay.\r\n\r\n- Right.\r\n\r\n- But I think that how everybody is also agreeing, there's a lot of validation in knowing that your dream changes daily, monthly, yearly, secondly. And also that's okay. I think at the root of it, as Mike said, as long as you are happy, you're living your dream. And if you happen to be happy at 10:30, mad at 10:45-\r\n\r\n- Yeah.\r\n\r\n- Okay, at 11:00, you know, you're still living your dream.\r\n\r\n- Yes, it changes moment to moment. And it's so funny that we're talking about this because yesterday, that's what I experienced. I went from low to high, putting out fires, then I'm good-\r\n\r\n- Me too.\r\n\r\n- Then something else happens. It's like, okay, let me take a deep breath. We're gonna get through it, it's gonna be fine, let's go. And then the next moment was like, okay, I just need a moment. Just let me go sit down by myself for a second. So I think it changes all the time.\r\n\r\n- Absolutely, and I think that looking back helps a lot. And I can look back a lot farther than you all can, but as I look back, I see how things have worked out, and, you know, the bad times and the good and the good choices and the bad choices, and the way it's all put together, and the people that I'm involved with, and who we can count on and who can count on me, and how that contributes a lot.\r\n\r\n- I definitely resonate that, and I think people, we're all in a student-facing position, and I think we often think about the people that we work with, definitely, on a day-to-day basis, but also the students we get to interact with and engage with in many capacities, from the students that are stressed, to the students that are excited about their futures, to the students that really don't know what is next for them at all, and are confused or worried. We see these students on a day-to-day basis, and we watch them emerge from wherever they're coming from into this new person, into this new space, and I think we all have a sense of, like, we get to see them live into their dream. And I would love to talk a little bit more about that, watching people live into their dream. Where have you seen that? Is there any specific encounter that you have had? I know Meg, you've been a college advisor for years, you've also encountered working with student workers and different things across the university. So I would love to hear where you've seen someone live into their dream.\r\n\r\n- Yeah, sure, and you mentioning students and the choices they make. I think my favorite time of year is to see first year students come to campus and come to college and decide who they're gonna be, what they're gonna do, who they're gonna hang out with, how they're gonna spend their time. I know it's frightening for them, but it's a wonderful, wonderful time to see them exploring and growing and deciding what they wanna do. And that brings me energy every year. I did my undergrad as an older student and I still was fascinated by first years coming in and kind of starting to build themselves into who they want it to be. And it's great to see, and when students take advantage of the hundreds of people working here, to be sure that they have the resources and the attention and care that they need, that they plug into that, connect with those humans who are looking out for them and make those choices and just decide what they wanna do and build up their confidence that they can do it.\r\n\r\n- And I like to see them through this phase as well. But, you know, constantly providing that encouragement, that it's okay to mess up right now. If you're gonna mess up, this is the space in which to do it. And again, live the dream, live it up, 'cause this is gonna happen only once in your life. So take advantage of everything. And not everybody, but you know what I mean, your resources.\r\n\r\n- Yeah.\r\n\r\n- As you go through this, and it's really okay to kind of mess up as you try to figure this out.\r\n\r\n- And I think this topic is kind of the jelly to my peanut butter. I absolutely love it. I also think there's a lot of power in that encouragement aspect of encouraging students, young people, even adults, to be who they want to be. So I saw it a lot, obviously, working in athletics where, you know, all I know how to do is bounce a basketball. No, you don't. You know how to do so much more. Well, you know, nobody sees me like that. Do you see yourself like that? Okay, well let's work on that, and that's okay. You know, please hold onto your dream of wanting to go into professional sports and be the next whoever you wanna be, but also hold onto the dream if you want to go and take over Twitter, or something one day, or X or whatever it's called these days. And that's okay, you know. One of my favorite students that I still remember to this day was a big old football player and he wanted to be a mortician. And I loved it, you know, and we would have conversations about it, and sometimes I didn't want to hear them, but then I got into true crime and now it's all I want to hear. But those, to me, are some of the best rewarding parts, especially to be able to see them come back and tell you, you know, \"Miss Nicole, guess what, I'm dealing with bodies.\" And I'm like, \"Yes, good for you, good for you, that is awesome.\" So the return that you, I'm not gonna say often get to see, right? Sometimes as younger people go on and continue to grow, they go on and continue to grow, but those moments where you have those students who, you know, remember those conversations they have with you and come back to you and tell you, \"I accomplished a majority of what we talked about,\" you know, that's a great feeling as well too.\r\n\r\n- Yeah, and I wanna speak to it from a stance of we don't have to be all things for all people either. I think that's often a struggle, when we think about helping people live into their dreams, is sometimes we're the ones that take a step back and we identify someone that is more capable, more qualified, or even just a better fit at helping to address something that's happening and getting out of our own way to know that we are not the main helper in this person's life sometimes. I wanna shout out a colleague who was working with us in \"Resume Ready Days,\" and I was sitting there with a student and we were partnering together to help with the resume itself and to try to help the student realize the potential that they have. And me, as a male identifying individual, I was sitting there like, \"You could phrase it this way,\" and then my colleague stepped in and she goes, \"You can do this. I don't know if anybody's ever told you, you can do this, but you can do this. You are a strong woman, and I believe in what you are saying here in your resume, and we can rephrase this. You can empower yourself to do this and put yourself out there and to stand out and it's gonna make a difference.\" And that's something I couldn't necessarily say in the moment. And my colleague did, she stepped in, and that's what that student needed, and it made a difference. And I think that's what sometimes life is about, is living into that dream, by allowing others to step in, be empowered by others.\r\n\r\n- Mmhmm.\r\n\r\n- Mmhmm, and what you just said brought up something I was looking up because, for me personally, I don't use \"Living the dream\" as like the go-to phase, but the thing that this article I was reading referenced was like, how people use it to denote \"I'm living in my success.\" And so a lot of what y'all were talking about reminded me of, as we're working with students, to remind them that living the dream is not only putting in the work to get their resume reviews, cover letters, but it's also about living in what success might be in the current moment. And so when you were talking about first years, I'm like, for a lot of people getting to Duke is a dream. And so living in that dream and realizing like, my feet are here, I'm in Durham, I'm walking across these campus, living out that dream. I think that's another thing to kind of say in this, you know, podcast episode. Be like, living the dream is also feeling grounded in that present moment too.\r\n\r\n- Yeah.\r\n\r\n- Yes.\r\n\r\n- We are real lucky in that we can support students. We're not invested in them, you know, being able to pay their way through the world. We don't have all the worries that their family might have. And what we need to do is support 'em and help 'em find that magic. It's cool.\r\n\r\n- And I think we weave in and out of it. And so I'm curious, from each of you, what has been that aha moment, and Meg, we'll start with you. What has been that aha moment of like, I think right now, this is it. I think I'm living into this dream. I think I'm here, I think I see the things that I've always wanted to do and I'm doing it.\r\n\r\n- Mm goodness. That's not a lot to think about. Yeah, I think I've been there a few times and I can, you know, I can talk about this week, if we want. I've made some funny career decisions in my life, and I think that I often wonder why I've been in the career center for 20 years. And it's really because I enjoy it. There's nothing keeping me there, except for my choices. And sometimes I haven't enjoyed it a lot. And I enjoyed my outside life a lot. I had beautiful things going on. And right now, work is wonderful. I get to work with great people, great students. I get to play golf every now and then. I don't have a lot of worries or fear. And that's good for me, I'm happy with that.\r\n\r\n- I had a moment, I would say last week, during our staff meeting, kind of how you mentioned, you know, I've made a decent amount of career choices as well too. But at the root of it, I was always trying to figure out the piece that keeps drawing me, or I should say keeping me in higher ed, right? Because it's a special place to be. But the root of it has always been giving back what was given to me at a young age. When I was in college and somebody telling me, \"You know what, I got you. Let's figure out some things that you enjoy doing,\" you know, and meeting people along the way, and developing me as a person. And I think that has been the root of every piece of the job that I have enjoyed in every capacity that I've been in. It's that inspiring that person to believe in themselves and you've got the power to speak up, and if you think you can dunk at 5'4\", you go dunk that ball, right? So just being able to find those ways to have people really kind of know that somebody believes in them, you know. It may matter, it may not matter, but hopefully that's enough for them to maybe re-switch on something that they were trying to accomplish or something. And last week, you know, we do our Unsung Hero Award and somebody got me and I cried in a staff meeting, and nobody said anything, but anyway.\r\n\r\n- Oh, I missed it.\r\n\r\n- It was incredibly rewarding and confirming to know that at the times where I feel like I'm not still doing that, that I am still doing it. And it's nice to know that no matter where I go, because it is the root of what I enjoy doing, that I'm still able to continue to do it. So definitely a nice aha moment to kind of keep me going and continue, you know, growing myself so that I can continue to help grow others, whether they be young or older.\r\n\r\n- Yeah, and I think you touch on something that maybe we all have in common, and that is kind of a faith in people and a desire to look and really see what's in there. We're not gonna make stuff up, we're not gonna tell you you're great at something when you're not. We're gonna look at you and try and see you and help you pull out those things you are great at because we believe there are things. I love that about y'all.\r\n\r\n- Okay. Rudy, listen, I heard you, and I started processing as soon as you asked the question, but give me the question back one more time.\r\n\r\n- Now I gotta remember the question.\r\n\r\n- It was those aha moments-\r\n\r\n- Those aha moments.\r\n\r\n- Yes.\r\n\r\n- Sometimes y'all, I just think of stuff and then it goes away-\r\n\r\n- Enamored by what you were saying-\r\n\r\n- The aha moments when I knew I was living a dream.\r\n\r\n- Yeah.\r\n\r\n- I appreciate you being present and not focusing on what you're gonna say while we're all speaking.\r\n\r\n- Yes. It's like Mike said, it's happened a couple times, and like all of us, we've done different things, but I think, because I truly enjoy helping people, and I truly enjoy trying to strategize to figure out how to help them get to their next spot, when things kind of start like going haywire, and the folks that I've been working with, the students that I've been working with are able to make it happen, and I don't have to do anything but sit back and watch. It's just like, oh, like you were listening what I was doing. I was doing something. Nicole said, \"There are times where I just don't know if I'm doing enough,\" but when I'm able to kind of sit back and just see people be great and be in their space and thrive, it's just like, oh yes, this is it. Like this is where I'm supposed to be. And like, again, it's happening in different phases, whether I was in athletics, whether I was in advising, whether I'm in this career center mode right now. It's just seeing people be great is when I figure out like, yes, I've linked in, the stars have aligned. Is that Kendrick Lamar all the stars? Yeah?\r\n\r\n- Whoop.\r\n\r\n- Wakanda, thank you, Kay. Okay, if y'all could see this body roll right here.\r\n\r\n- I wasn't even sure what to call it.\r\n\r\n- Nicole is shook.\r\n\r\n- In that moment, I wasn't pressing. In that moment I was not.\r\n\r\n- Yeah, that's all I got right now, after that body roll. We need a camera in here, y'all.\r\n\r\n- I know, I know.\r\n\r\n- I think sometimes we get hung up on doing the right thing to get prepared for the next thing. I think I had an aha moment in my life when I realized that I was a leader. In whatever role I have, I see myself as a leader. And I think it came from joining the circus. When I traveled with the circus for a year, and really learned a lot about people and humanity and the way people operate. And there were young people there, trying to prepare for a career, whether it was doing the trapeze or riding a motorcycle on a wire, or whatever it was, they were still just people trying to figure out their way. And by learning and watching and being curious about people, I think it set me up to be a leader. And I think that students can take so much more from the experiences they do have than they understand. And I think that that's a lot of the meaning of your work and everybody on campus's work, the career everywhere business, right, is to help students see themselves.\r\n\r\n- And with that, that's the \"What's Career Got To Do With It\" podcast. Thank you for joining us. We hope to see you again soon.\r\n\r\n- Bye y'all.\r\n\r\n- Goodbye.\r\n\r\n- Bye.","author_name":"Sandhya Pakala","html":"\u003Ciframe width=\"640\" height=\"360\" src=\"https:\/\/warpwire.duke.edu\/w\/rzgIAA\/\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"autoplay; encrypted-media; camera; microphone; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen\u003E\u003C\/iframe\u003E","height":360,"width":640,"thumbnail_height":360,"thumbnail_width":640,"url":"https:\/\/warpwire.duke.edu\/w\/rzgIAA\/","type":"video","title":"S3 E11 Living the dream...with Meg Wilson","thumbnail_url":"https:\/\/warpwire.duke.edu\/img\/10ED13AE-DB77-4E78-BDAA-21F9B14D30E1\/C5266183-B1F2-4829-9443-8F8F8338CBBD\/large\/"}